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Hindsight is 20/20
My brief foray into the Muslim world
It never felt completely right in my gut.
I tried to put that gut feeling aside and it would not leave me. It persisted. When my mother died I gained more emotional and spiritual clarity. When my daughter left home in a fiery trail that I have yet to tend, a wall crumbled and I gained even more clarity.
I did not feel entirely okay with my choice to become a Muslim—in my gut.
I never attended a mosque. I went to 2 or 3 events in 6 years. I felt like a square peg in a round hole. No teacher or guide took an interest in my journey or my relationship with g-d. No one cared what led me to there. No one cared about me, the person. I served the larger machine, a cog in the wheel — no value aside from an empty body to pile alongside the rest of them. With the Muslim world, all serve the religion. No one serves g-d, only the human vision of g-d. Islam is perfect they say, and they do believe it. They mean to mould you and me according to their delusion of perfect Islam, some ridiculous fake 7th century myth fed by hate and misogyny and jealousy. G-d does not live here in this cluster of extreme self-worship.
The Muslim community struck me as strangely apathetic and uncaring about anything that ventured beyond the narrow tribal scope delineated by the Mohammad Hijab 5 Pillars Linda Sarsour Cult of Narcissism. In fact, an early memory I have involves attending a class and noticing all the cool Muslim women didn’t show because they had tickets to fangirl their role model Linda Sarsour when she came to Vancouver. Around that time Sarsour had hung around with Farrakhan and I could barely believe the sh1t storm my trusting + naïve Canadian self had walked into.
Trying to get Muslim women to care about the issues affecting Canada felt like trying to get my 10 year old son to shower or flush the toilet — thankless and nearly impossible. Only I expect a 10 year old boy going thru some rough family times and also growing pains to exhibit difficult behaviour and I expect grown women who purport to practise modesty in a religion of peace to exhibit mature adult behaviour and care about the human society in which they live rather than embrace policy decisions that will destroy society because their hatred and cultural jealousy makes them unable to see clearly or think soundly.
Gender Self ID destroying women’s rights? That‘s white feminism, don’t care. Women’s rights in Iran? Iranian women burn their hijabs they’re Islamophobic, don’t care. Homelessness and addiction and hunger? Only during Ramadan when we can score extra piety points, only to be seen as good Muslims, religion of peace. Sexual abuse of Catholics depicted in The Keepers? That’s white tears, not interested. That’s Kafir/Infidel religion, not interested. Abuse at boarding schools? Only for non white kids, not interested in white tears. White people make everything about themselves. On it goes, an endless stream of cluster B bullsh1t.
Muslims only liked me because they thought I belonged to their tribe and their rules tell them they must be nice to tribe members. Only not all Muslims are equal. Cradle Muslims are more equal than others, especially those of Arabic descent or those visibly Muslim. (Hint: Bosnian Muslims look whites, not them. Turkish Muslims look white and they are traitors, screw Kemalism, not them either). Converts can sit over there, doncha know — they are the untermensch of the Muslim world, they have affiliations with non Muslims, y’know infidels, they do sinful things like acknowledge Christmas and cavort with Kuffar. Muslims only liked me as long as they thought I would be willing to hollow myself out completely and allow myself to be filled up with their narcissism masquerading as piety.
Why would I do that? Muslims kind of need converts and they treat them like crap when they ought to roll out the red carpet and ask us what led us to them. But, nah, no one ever thought to ask me this question. Wildly, the ability to detach myself from the religion of my birth and seek and embrace a totally foreign religion that’s considered hostile in the west did not seem valuable to the narcissism community of Muslims and their perfect religion.
I watched whilst the collective Muslim world consistently emotionally masturbated over their perceived victimhood. The Muslim world constantly bathes in its perceived innocence, glorifying weakness + victim status, vilifying triumph + strength. At every opportunity Muslims use victimhood as a shield to block any and all responsibility for their own situation. The obsession with colonialism comes from the expectation that the west will provide them with everything and let them piss and spit on us. It reminds me of the insolent adolescent who behaves like an asshole and never takes responsibility, leaves messes all over the house like a ridiculous baby and gets mad when mum is late with dinner or the allowance or the car keys.
Like, get a grip and grow up. I am so done.
Everything in the Muslim world revolves around the cult of grievance + victimhood. All the time. Freedom is slavery. Capitalism is slavery. The west is bad. Arab Tyrants and the failed state of Pakistan are not real, it’s the fault of white people everywhere, Christian Americans did that, not Muslims. Secularism is bigotry. Jewish self determination is racist. Attempts to eradicate radical Islam are “Islamophobic”. Accountability is backbiting. Wahhhhhh. Cry bullying is a culture now, what the fcuk.
There’s an excuse for everything and there’s no attempt to do anything other than sit in psychological impotence and expect the world to rescue you from your own arrogance and ignorance and hatred and self loathing. It’s a fcuking boring joyless self loathing club for emotionally stunted drones who only get off on their own grievances. Trauma … Israeli occupation … the nasty Joos are so mean … blah blah blah. Are we done yet? This looks + feels like a neural and social compulsion to me, a cult of destruction and hate, not a faith community. Where are the values? Nowhere. You don’t get values from a human society that has build itself upon identity. Identity + values cannot co-exist, not the way the IslamoMarxist Nazis envision.
I began documenting Islamist extremism and antisemitism on Telegram because Twitter massively suppressed my posts about Hamas and the massacre. You can subscribe to follow my posts, which include the graphic footage from the October 7 massacre taken by recovery workers themselves in Israel. Disimpacting My Brain.
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